As I awake from sleep and take in my first thoughtful breath, I ponder quietly ‘Is Wisdom here today? Did she get lonely and wonder off to someone more interesting during the long night?’
In today’s Gospel, the chief priests, the scribes, and the elders are not seeking Wisdom. They only want to hear what they already believe is true. They are closed minded and wisdom is not currently within their reach. The men gather and struggle to form their response to Jesus’ question all knowing that Wisdom is not within the grasp. Wisdom is not shy and she will not hide from those who have made the effort to find peace by her side.
Sure they believe that Wisdom already lives within them, but they do not dare to question that reality for the cost would be their own identities.
If they were truly open in their hearts and minds and asked Jesus with the spirit of a child, they might begin to open the door to wisdom. They must breathe in Wisdom and release the angst they feel from deep within their souls or they will never enjoy the peace and freedom that comes from knowing wisdom. Wisdom is very powerful and knows the peace that can be shared with her acceptance, but only those who languish on her words as gospel or pure truth can be free.
Knowing Wisdom is not like an Ah-Ha moment in life. She comes to us through continual, thoughtful, everyday prayer. My story is not new or unfamiliar to most people. When my brother was 33, he took his own precious life. I begged Jesus to give him back. I thought I was pleading my case to the highest authority; however, I only heard what I thought was the truth that Jesus did not love my brother and that is why He allowed this to happen to me. So I turned my back and left Him. Fortunately, He did not do the same to me. I yelled at Him for years actually, but He never left me. Maybe I only yelled because I knew He did not leave me. Gradually I began speaking to Him and more importantly I noticed Jesus was following me around again. Don’t get me wrong, I always knew He was with me I was just to closed-off to hear what He had to say. Wisdom slowly and patiently began to trust me and inch by inch came into my life. I have long forgiven Jesus and was filled with the Wisdom that my brother is loved and that he is safe at home.
‘Drink Wisdom in until you feel it softly reach your toes and rises back up through your spine bringing the sweetest smile to your lips as she is pure, sweet poetry. Your questions will no longer be left unheard by Wisdom, your peace has been granted.’
Darlene McClure is a retreatant at Christ the King Passionist Retreat Center in Citrus Heights, CA.